Parents

Do you think you should have to get along with each parent in ways you don't like, say your mom has certain strengths your dad doesn't or your dad has certain weaknesses your mom doesn't, other than in racial placement?

What I'm Doing

I had 2 pieces of French bread pizza and grapefruit juice and water.

I'm cooking a pretty big piece of beef and spinach and mushrooms I found in the refrigerator, which is what I liked to buy and my mom got for me.

I'm also cooking eggs to make egg salad sandwich.

My grandma gave us the Christmas candy and several gingerbread cookies.  I had a buckeye, a piece of peanut butter fudge (no chocolate, I think,) and one of the cookies with marshmallows, which I best liked,for once.  I was wondering in New Orleans to me it seemed the thing was to be like spicy and of the old-fashioned based heritage that's become vintage and takes over the civilization, which is very rather sedentary.  I guess moving can be a big deal.  So, I kinda grew up more strict and modern in a sense, not about baking cookies and not really making any fudge.  It's probably because my mom's not American and something else.  My dad liked things like peanut butter cookies.  His dad drank a lot so probably wasn't a cookie guy, not from a farm and had a college degree to be a funeral director who did everything, I think.  I know he liked Edgar Allan Poe and that my dad has read lots of other like science fiction type philosophy seeming themed interest books.  As far as I know, his dad is all white, but I found that most people have Jewish last names from the Germany area.  It seems like a big deal that my grandma's mom wasn't indian.  She wasn't even always sure she was indian.  Supposedly, the records burned down in a building.

So, I'm gonna watch "The Ellen DeGeneres Show."  I have 3 episodes to catch up on.  I was thinking of watching today's 1st, in case I don't get to the day before, I guess, not sure which is better, this time.  The other 1 I don't have recorded because we got a new TV thing.  So, I should watch the videos online and think I happened to see 1 or 2 from her Twitter.

Food

What should I do?  My dad won't bring me home fancy restaurant food, like Olive Garden or Applebee's.  Also, when I went out to eat with him at Perkins, he made me stimulated or aroused but not feel like a tingly feeling in my stomach and tried associating it with a waitress.  He also believes if an idea ticks that it's, like, absolutely something true.  I haven't eaten at a fancy restaurant in a long time.  I've been eating alone, got tired of soup and Tyson's chicken strips.  I've been getting subs and fast food.  At home, I have my beef and cooked greens.  I don't like peppers, onions, tomatos, etc.  I won't eat them, unless they were chopped up into tiny bits and mixed with bread or something like that.  I even stopped putting spice on it.  My parents eat weirdly, weird simple Asian-based food that is kinda unhealthy and not very tasty or some fancy fix-up with sorta just more hot spices and maybe some kinda juicy sauce.  I never eat with them, anymore.  They usually just have chicken and often have rice.  I started eating like this because I had such a good time at Cracker Barrel.  Once, my dad was rude to me and I got mad.  It sounded like 1 guy suddenly said, "nigger."  I was getting tired of just Olive Garden and Cracker Barrel.

So, it sounds like some people want to know if I liked what my mom cooked when I was little, when she's Asian and the good stuff isn't sold here.  I did eat things like Pizza Lunchables, maybe twice a week, funny on top of pizza on Fridays at that school.  My mom didn't like engage me in picking out food at the grocery store, and I learned what people at a long time ago in the U.S.  I can't believe how you|anyone would actually went|go into what my dad ate.  Yea, he's from a farming area, but they don't eat the kind of stuff you eat in the West|Midwest.  Their food seems thin.  I guess moving to the New Orleans area, my appetite increased.  It's funny, though, his family is from Northwestern Pennsylvania.  I think that my grandma has always made good candy, Buckeyes, chocolate fudge, peanut butter fudge, these things of a compilation with marshmallows like fudgy cookies, and oatmeal cookies, which lots of people have made.  It is about the best I've tasted, had a good homemade taste.  Speaking of my grandma, it seems people say that I'm not good as a suggestion but never say why and the reason is never clear.  My parents think I don't have total attitude control and that it doesn't matter if people are mean to me.  I don't really know what it's like to get mad at other people having your food.  I think Italy has good ice cream shops.  In Florida, I guess the food is kinda made to be satisfying yet trashy in a lot of ways but not like infested with maggots.  I think Ellen DeGeneres gets mad at me for growing up in Southeastern and Northeastern Florida until I turned 12 because I'm really tight, realy tightly built and compact, in a way that is not necessary but sorta the arsenal I have in life, unnecessary in that my life isn't complete.  That may not make sense, but you may not really know.  I mean, if you did, you could tell me.  I can't really fix things like that that sound good.  Well, the restaurants are a bit, er, ... what's the word ... vengeful.  I guess the food is fine at the fancy restaurants.

Part of the thing is I thought it'd be cool "not to cook."

Problem

My dad is really bad, really mean, like in a hidden way, thinks it's okay for certain reasons, 1st seeing Johnny Depp in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory directed by Tim Burton, then me not being able to do well in college partly because my life became an experiment and no one was direct with me, like it was to balance the situation.  Then, I used store cards and thought in the experiment I was supposed to call someone the n word.

The Mall

My dad went to the mall and I think was trying to spread more hypnosis on how to treat me.  Isn't it sick how my dad, mom, and other relatives do that?

Problem

My dad seems to have gotten quite mad, forgot what he said.  Not really.  He went to see my therapist, and I stayed home.  I think she talked to him about my blog.  I already invited him to go comment.  I'm supposed to usher him to it or whatever.  He seems to be sorta boastful or what's the word, puffing out his chest, proud of his mom's antics after the n word thing, like thinking "her son" is important and he needs to hurt me since my life is getting better.

Also, why is Tim Burton such a scardy cat?  I thought cool people from L.A. were stronger.  That is so suggestive, you know?  I read, also, though, that his parents came from Canada.  You have to watch out for people from Canada and Latin America.  Sometimes, people think this of Australia or maybe like definitely the Filipins.. they went on rattled on about how it was like I forget no unreal and 3rd world.

It was a safehouse for Hispanics, I guess mixed people.  Lots of mixed people are in Australia, Texas, and L.A. and California.  NYC.  I know of at least 1 more white Asian in NYC.

I'm upset because my dad seems upset that people from Florida never liked him.  He's bad.  He treated me badly for things I did.  It wasn't anything like concrete nor blunt nor like very bad very often you'd concur from me, in the end.  It seems like my relationship with Florida went down the drain.  So, what do you think about Elle Fanning living in L.A.?  It's a safehouse for actors.  I don't know if I wanna count her, anymore.  She moved at age 1 and seems conceited about Georgian heritage but despises it just to think it's cool and now looks kinda sad.  Maybe, she'll get better.  I think she's trying to look different and has been going through too many changes.

Problem With My Attitude?

I'm mad at my mom for getting in 2 car accidents that gave her an eye injury and gave her glasses.

When my dad comes, I'm no longer happy, I guess because of things he's done to me and other things he's supposedly caused.

My Parents

So, I wasn't supposed to talk to strangers growing up.

My mom is open to black people but not strong, though I don't really feel withheld.

My dad seems to think they're humble, racially.

How My Parents Taught Me

My dad never wanted me to think things were cute and pleasurable in order to succeed morally speaking.  My mom never encouraged me to be racist.

Problem

STOP INSULTING ME WITH THE TIMING OF HOW YOU LOAD THE COMPUTER.  THEY CALLED SOMEONE'S FOOT VIETNAM.

Also, they think Ellen DeGeneres is insulting me for fun.  It's really annoying.  I'm not gonna think about that.

Also, stop poking at my dad because you also gave my mom glasses.

Ellen DeGeneres keeps making me feel weird and like I shouldn't be cool.

Problem

Why do you keep spouting lies at me, and what about the connotation of the word lies floats your fancy?  You don't have anything to say.  What about food?  What am I supposed to do?  My dad eats out with me but won't bring it home.

So, I get to sit here hours a day plowing through shit?

Problem

My eyes kinda feel meshy, like they're going out, with pressure.  Kinda like fuzzy, fading.  I have a feeling I need a rest from 711.  It's so hard to come by food.  My dad doesn't seem to want to bring me home good restaurant food.

Problem

So, apparently, my dad thinks my life should be littered with problems.  Why is he nice to others.  He's pretty much a pig.

Problem

Last season, Ellen DeGeneres was onto what you think in private.  This season, I thought she had messages for me as annoying clicks in my room and then got mad she did it, then like I couldn't get restaurant food taken to me recently, my mom got glasses, and I think something else, more of an idea, which made sense in the end.  Like, sometimes, I didn't feel like going to the grocery store or my dad wouldn't buy me enough some.

Problem

Ellen DeGeneres, because of you, I don't want messages that you're trying to mold my dad.  I don't want a relationship with him if you're helping him.

Problem

Didn't I already make a blog post, buried somewhere... anyway, no one responds to this in my life.  I don't know about categorizing things like this.  So, I got mad, locked in my room, because of New Orleans and then Orlando, after Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, felt totally tortured, and e-mailed people nicely.  My dad rattled on that I called them niggers, like it mattered..  I think, 1st, someone stopped, or maybe it was someone else.  Well, I think, then, I got mad at a girl, but she was acting racist.  I know it's improper, and I wanted her to talk to me more.  I don't remember what I said, but I didn't say, "You're a nigger," or, "I'm gonna *beep* you."  I used to write more very, very detailed.

Oh, and no one would admit she was really being racist.  It was very contrived.  You know, they just rattle on about morals and being white, and they're part Native American indian, like Johnny Depp.  I might be.  Wow, but they don't really mean it but will rattle on more.  They're like balloon heads.  I don't think this is the right way to talk about something, but I guess we should have started writing sooner.

I don't know what about Johnny Depp in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory directed by Tim Burton strikes a nerve with you.  You're gonna have to be taken in and realize this is your problem and that I don't approve of this problem, which I see in everyone I meet very strongly.  You'll just have to get out of my life, in this way.  Help!  Someone do something.  The police aren't listening.  They're invading me with messages.

Problem

So, I was gonna post something to Ellen DeGeneres, but then this happened.  I was gonna reflect on my past.  I had posted a lot on someone's Facebook.  HEY I DON'T FEEL LIKE TYPING.  DID YOU DO THAT ELLEN?  SOMEONE *BEEP* MY DAD.  I DON'T GIVE A CRAP ABOUT THIS.  STOP!  WHAT'S YOUR PROBLEM?  YOU A PIECE OF SHIT?

Problem

My mom is acting up.  She acts like suggestive to me, like how she used to care more about me.  Who cares about her?  Why isn't she fat?  And out of proportion.  She made it so I couldn't think, and I took all day on my homework.  I think my mom and dad made it harder for me.  She's being suggestive, something I forget that supposedly my dad's mom said.  Just knock out my dad and his side, they're annoying.

Problem

My dad wears glasses.  I wonder if that's why my mom does.  He acts stupid.  He says he's smart but not as hard-working as me.

Showered

I took a shower and bath.  My vision is a little blurry.  My dad suggested I was blind.

I also have cream over a rubbery, salty pimple over the side of my lip.

My neck's been hurting, and now my back had a kinda fold, like a crease, in the middle.

I almost fell asleep in the bathtub a few times.